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2003-07-02, 10:57 a.m.:
When I see Dolly, I get the Dollywood***

Rain, rain, work, complain, bitch, moan, rain.

That�s it for this update, see you next week!

OK, really. I know on Friday I seemed to think that I had a two-entry day in me, and then I didn�t update for like four days.

Sorry.

I�ve just been really busy, see, with the above. The bitching, the moaning. And let�s not forget the complaining.

Or the motherfucking raining.

In all truthfulness, my weekend was OK. Friday night C�s jazz band played downtown at a brewery. It was empty as hell, but still fun because I got to hang out with my best male friend, Joshua, and his becoming-less-snarky wife, Jessica. It was really fun and low key and the music rocked. Saturday. We slept in, took the Notorious D.O.G. for a hike, and then C had to drive to East Bumblefuck to play at a class reunion. So, I went and saw Anger Management with Joshua and Jessica. Yep, two nights in a row with the married couple. I was beginning to remember what it felt like to be the tag-along single girl, and I didn�t really like it.

I love doing things alone, but hanging out for two nights in a row with a touchy-feely couple was�meh.

Anger Management surprised me by having a hilarious supporting cast. John Turturro! I love him. John C. Reilly. Also love. Overall the movie was a bit predictable and featured a lot of Marisa Tomei looking �adorable�, but it was worth seeing at the $2 movie theatre. And I got some Hot Tamales. Yum.

On Sunday C and I were bit by the home improvement bug and we went a little crazy. I threw out 3 garbage bags of bad food/spoiled soy milk/freezer burned crap. I defrosted the freezer (attacking it with an actual knife to get all of the ice out). I went to the grocery store and bought a weeks worth of meals. I washed both of our cars. C began cleaning out the basement.

I cannot express to you how full of crap our basement is, but let�s put it this way: C spent five hours cleaning and throwing stuff out. He filled the 70 cu. feet of space in my car with stuff for the dump, and we have at least three more loads to do. It still looks awful, but he made a wee dent in the awful.

He also discovered that he has enough parts to build me a really sweet mountain bike. Whoo! Pretty soon I�ll be able to keep up with amblus! OK, there�s no way, but still! Bike!

***a line from a prolific rap that C wrote called �Tony Danza�.

SPAM SPAM SPAM

Hilarious Spam subject lines:

� 1 Acre of land on the moon 29.99

� I too, can have a ggigganticc peeniss!!!

� [Mayapple�s real name], stop spyware bitches!

� Bigger penis head - created a more mushroomed and muscular look!!

� From: Skinny Person To: Fat Person

� Make your knob fat for her stench!

� Rectal Rooter: Pay with Cash or Pay with your Ass!

� You can buy Love, the Beatles were wrong!

� Say It With Poop!

� Be a love machine minivan!

� Vanilla filled cookies for YOU

� Poop! There it is!

� You are getting Veeeeerry Horny

� zwbfyBrokenmanliness? W

� Satisfy your woman, you pin dick!

� Oops, my booty is showing!

� THE BALLMAN SAVES YOU MONEY!!!

� Your dog can be smarter!

� Avoid Sin. Don't Eat Chicken.

Most of those I have actually gotten at some point or another, but some I got from friends. Poop! There it is!

Currently Reading:

Wicked by Gregory Maguire. I am so loving this book. I�m flying through it, and I keep having to slow myself down because I don�t want it to be over yet. I am a bit of a voracious reader.

I also just finished Jenny and the Jaws of Life by Jincey Willet. If you like short stories (I do), you�ll probably really love this book as well (I did). The only bad is, by the time I started to really want to learn more about some of the characters, the story was over. Oh well.

One little link�

The Diet Coke of Snark recaps shows that Television Without Pity doesn�t.

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